......LISTEN: dAtinGs A Waste oF TymE.....

To some people im strait weird or border line white sue to my tatse in music and clothing but hey i am who i am and im dang near 23 which means im independent enuf to understand its okay to be different...which leads me to saying KATY PERRY is pretty much the shit! LOL i soooooooo slept on her music and work but its so much better than i thought! I def wanted to share two of my favs by her and hopefully i"ll be helping you broaden ur musical taste ..so eat up! lol

I Think Im Ready - Katy Perry

Youre so gay (Cory Enemy Skeet Skeet Remix) - Katy Perry

In other news I woke up before jumpin into my skool clothes and over sized hand bag and got incredibly inspired from a convo wit the roomies. We sat on our brand nu used couch from craigslist and discussed why we think dating is a waste of time because nothing ever works out! Being that we are in our early twenties we are pretty much in a lose lose battle with yung men these days so i wrote about it....feel free to comment if im wrong but...LISTEN DATING TRULY IS A WASTE OF TYME!

Dating is a waste of time
By now at 23 ive heard every line
You exchange digits and have pointless conversations
And weeks or months later you and him are haven relations
He tells stories about how his ready to possibly change
So u delete numbers and your life starts to rearrange
He may admit that his not ready to settle down
But ur hopeful ladies so u stick around
Movies, dinner, the mall, and a few nights at home
It feels good to finally not be alone
The sex is great and his looks make up for everything he lacks in ambition
So now your holden on to all of that while putting yourself in a compromising position
His kisses melt you like butter and his hugs make u feel safe and all
But the fact that he needs other chicks begins to be his downfall
By now his won you over with his smile but his late night text make u feel like his runnin game
And now u you start to feel like "all niggas are the same"
You begin to see things on facebook that make u think twice
He stops doin things that use to be nice
Two months into it ur just old news
So things get routine and u get the blues
No longer is it exciting when he walks thru the door
Cus when he comes in he don’t even kiss u no more
ESPN and Playstation get more love than you
And since your hearing things about him creepin u start to ask "is it true?"
But NOW you”ve over stepped your boundaries so he reminds you that “you ain’t my girl remember?”
Your bed was just a pit stop and your bootie was a lender
Stupid you to go out of your way and play the act of main chick for so long
Bring on the Kleenex and a good Keisha Cole song
Its gonna be a long night
Cus what Your about to have is the official "fUcK yOu fIgHt"
It’s a bunch of fuck u fuck fuck u’s and u were neva shits
And by then end of the convo ur both ready to call it quits
You kick him out and pack his random little things
Ignore his fone calls when the fone rings
Reply to text messages with an attitude and no smiley faces
Every memory you have of him erases
Pictures, his soap, his tooth brush, and charger all meet the trash
After admitting his been talken to other chicks You wana go Jasmine Sullivan but hey you got class
So when you see him you ignore him and roll your eyes
By now his got somebody new and you”ve barely said your goodbyes
Dating is a waste of time
Im 23 and by now I’ve heard every line
It is a who can fuck who and leave who first type game’
And ladies our situations usually end up the same
So save you’re the time and heart ache
And believe when I say dating is a mistake

...heLLo mR.PresiDenT ....

its taken days for things to set in. we officially have a black president. i watched obama speak two days ago and almost found myself in tears three times. i couldn't believe that i was watching history that my kids and grandchildren will later ask me about. its been surreal, a blessing, a dream, and a pleasure to see the inauguration and the beginning of what hopefully is the end to a horrible battle and storm. I was once again at a lost for words when i saw my girl of all girls Beyonce sing for the president and first lady and if u missed it of course... i got u! eNjOy and try ur best to hold on to these memories and feelings...we are living history folks whether u realize it or not! :)

.....*N-O-T-O-R-I-O-U-S*....

happy sunday world!! saw the biggie movie and i have a nu respect for him and his journey!! i was always a tupac kinda girl but big hands down has always gotten love from the cd player and I. i heard lil kim wasnt to happy about how she was portrayed but the queen bee has nuthin to worry about cus she def still has me as a fan. an ex 3LW member played the hell out of the role as lil kim and if u havent made it to the theater yet heres a little of wat ur missin!


anywho i had another um....interesting nite last nite and have recently become irritated world cus i cant seem to figure sumthin out....why wen u want sumone to fall off the earth u see them everywhere but wen u want them to take over ur world they are no were to be found. im begining to wonder if god has a bigger sense of humor than i thought...maybe he just wants me to take a life lesson and laugh my latest troubles off and by shoving accidental run in and friendly reminder in my face his letting me kno that this is one "sitaution" i wont be able to just walk away from ....hmmmmm....idk got a little personal lol but if u ever just wanted to move on so bad but u kept seeing the obstacle it may become how do u say? FRUSTRATING lol well heres to moving the obstacle out the way and bein NOTORIOUS from here on out:)

.....fLiGht 2365....

iM n PhILLY

...for an hour! catching the flight back to my apartment was suppose to feel better than this...but it doesnt. Its cold here which depresses me cus i kno it will be even colder in oHiO. i get a lot of questions about oHio like: are there black people there? or does it snow everyday? my response to those questions are: if those things were true i wouldnt be there. lol seein as i have two more semesters before i throw the cap and walk away for good im hoping to chalk up past experiences and make this the last and best year of my college experience. college is funny thou u fight to get here and then u fight to get the hell out. im boarding the plane soon and i cant help but to dread that im going back to ego filled frat parties, alcohol fueled events, materialstic and selfish boys not men, disrespectful,judgemental, and unhonest girls, drama and rumored drowned campuses, nap consumed afternoons, noodle dinners, waffle house breakfast, and homework craming nights and suddenly i feel like wats the point? i began to think that maybe college was more harmful than helpful. i guess at this point its only natural that i found myself wanting to reread a text that my mom sent me: "The lessons along ur path are gods invitation for you to grow. Although we may be unaware of it God is always urging us forward giving us the experiences we need to surrender our mistaken ideas of life. Luv Mommy."

......ArE yOU paPeR oR PlAstIc?.....

Tonites my second open mic and to say the first was aight would be an understatement. I was never big on sharing my writing with people only because it felt so private and liek i was letting people into my brain which made me feel insecure and unguarded but sharing my heart in words has turned out to be better then sharing my heart physically which means i may have found a nu addiction. So thank you ..spokenword... for being my therapist:)

So as i'm sitting in a crowded dark room full of other people who have a love affair with periods, commas, and feelings i find myself inspired from a poem that keeps reciting the term "paper or plastic" ...paper or plastic... the poem was about sum lady and how she the store clerk reminded her of her grandmother wen she asked "paper or plastic?" The poem was kool and the poet was on point by the way :shoutout to www.blackpoetventure.com cus she was from their organization...anyway i took away sumthing totally different from her poem and he had nothing to do with an old lady lol

I think as a twenty sumthin year old growing women that sumtimes i have to ask myself
"aRe yOu pApEr or PLAsTIc?"

are u aritifical or real? are u about wats rite or wat feels rite? are u concerned with bein natural and who you are or is it easier to be fake and be sumone else? i recently have discovered that im about doin for others but that definetly to me is fake and would categorize me as plastic. or does it? can i naturally just want to see others happy? or is it unnatural to allow others to be happy while im still stuck to my plastic ways? its not easy to self analyze but i find that everyday im attempting to find out who i am and sumtimes i fail at being paper but dont feel comfortable being plastic.
im not sure how to transform from being plastic to paper but im guessing going
from a hard foundation to sumthin as smooth as paper may take longer than
my twenties to figure out.

....hEllo ArE u tHeRe.....

Wats nu world?!! i woke up today feelin optimistic and blessed so i cant complain about much of anything ! since skool is still out ive had time to catch up on sum music and sum tunes have successfully taken over the laptop and cd player SO.... i thought i would share with you my nu favs in hopes that u"ll also become addicted and we"ll share the same playlist:) consider it a privilege for me to share my musical interest and insight witcha! no worries i"ll bill u later! cant say that they are all happy go lucky liven my life like its golden type songs but hey bare with me for a few weeks!! in any case its good music!! with that ima throw the deuces for the day....GOD IS LOVE REV RUN lol

...Daddy's Girls....

ive def found my nu addiction!! ( which seems to be my nu catch phrase lol ) The Simmons Girls , Angela and Vanessa, remind me of me n my sis and therefore im given it two thumbs up cus they are pretty like us and equally ambitious!! besides now i have a nu reason besides upcoming college basketball to stay home on a monday nite lol until i recieve my own show heres two thumbs up to the black version of "The Hills". not mention angela recently got the boot and im down for n e one who can relate!!:) lol

....i"ve gOt a cRusH oN yoU.....

Okay so clearly i bounce back from traumatic let downs because already i must admit....i have a crush....

.....on these shoes.....
they have officially been stalking my dreams for 2 weeks
why cant they just leave me alone?? LOL and now i must
break my back and torture my wallet until i get them!
uggghhhhhh damn YOU shopping addiction!!!! :)

....hErE wE gO AgAiN....

i use to tell my brother to be careful with the hearts of girls.
sum things are fragile n unrepairable n the heart of a women is one of those
i use to explain that men don't understand the power they have over a womans heart,mind, n body
one mans actions can punish a season of men after n im afraid ive become a victim
wat may be small to them may alter us for life.
heres to the hopes my brother never makes a girl feel like i do......




im sick of hurting so bad
i guess thats y i get so mad
cus wat i wanted made me cry
then pushed me to wana die
killed my insides and caused me to scream
pain i still feel wen i dream
cus i still hurt so bad
i guess thats y i get so mad
i cant control my own pain
that type of shit can make u go insane
so mister i wana tell u that u hurt me
so bad
even thou u use to make my insides go mad
u have destroyed who i was with ur actions n words
ur games werent meant for me but instead them birds
silly me to buy in and now cry like child
and allow u to see my sanity go wild
cus i never knu that u'd make me hurt so bad
and literally drive me mad
made decisions that were to much for this southern bell
now i must pray over time to escape from hell
cus of my choices i now hurt so bad
so this is for everyone who has ever gone mad
i dont promise sanity will come again
u will watch him with others n jealousy may win
and it"ll still hurt so bad that ur words begin to vomit
and ur self control will refuse to sit
but wen u hurt this bad i dont suggest u take that shit
instead i say let urself lose control
instead just let it hurt so bad
and surcome to temporarily feelin glad
and blame ur actions on the fact that his made u mad
cus i dont promise happiness is tomorrow or the next day
so i"ll tell u wat they tell me "babygirl just pray"
ur tears may make u wana die
but its ok stop holdin it in... just cry
its only cus u hurt this bad
that he makes ur sun kissed skin go so mad
and ur tears burn wholes in the cheeks of who use to be innocent no more
i cry tears of brown eyes that are sore
a soul that i wrecked and a body that is weak
a horse voice that hesitates to speak
cus i hurt so bad
my vocal chords have screamed so much from goin mad
there is no voice of pulse of a body that sits in silence
fist that wait for violence
cus wen i fell i never knu u'd walk away
my body assumed u'd stay
and wen u kissed me i never knu that id one day wish to spit them back at u
instead of screaming ur name i should have screamed wats true
and the funny thing is i neva loved u kid
but i loved the things that u did
and that is now i hurt so bad
that ive turned my heart mad
silly u convincing my brain to kill pieces of me
the error of ur ways u"ll soon see
didn't u kno it was u not ur status that i use to miss
hold on lemme breath cus... i cant believe my body hurts like this
u can keep money, excuses, and mistakes
cus i realize u were one among many fakes
and now i hurt so bad
that i have officially gone mad

...gooDbYe 2008... bUt bEfOre i GO...

The holidays have come and gone and i could spill out all the
drama and thrills that have consumed me and kept me away
from you...or ....i could save that for the following days to come and
simply wish you a happy new year!!! I so far have had a vacation
full of tamales, menudo, ham, and greens ( how multicultural can
my family get LMBO?). I looked back on 08 and started to remember favorites..ya kno favorite songs, hottest looks, favorite cd's n stuf. So after over eating and sleeping
I realized out of all the non cable television
i've been watching that my favorite commercial of 08 was the following...
everyone loves sum Jay...rite? i mean u gotta love... " RULE NUMBER 99 STAY ON HER MIND" LOL idk why that turned me on ...but it did in so mnay ways LOL The point is if we could do things as smooth and calculated as Jay-z we'd all enjoy a better year!
so with that in mind take sum pointers for HOV himself and enjoy!
i look forward to hashing out life's up and downs with u in 09!